How rubbish is Defoe?

[rudi]

Let's ask maths.

Four scored today proving, using SCIENCE FACKED, that Crouch is three times better than JD.

PC=3JD

Now, it's also a SCIENCE FACKED that Pav is basically Crouch only shorter by a ratio of 1.07 and equal in every single other way (Pav's capacity to f**k the English language is offset by Pete's capacity to f**k Algerian prostitutes).

So PC=1.07RP

Therefore, Pav is 2.8 times the player Jermain is.

To continue:

Pav has scored 15 in 35 appearances for his international team, while Robbie Keane has 43 from 100, leaving both on a gpg ratio of 0.43!

This means that, shockingly, even RK=2.8JD

But wait! There's more troubling news for you sick, deluded, possibly closet racist JD fans...

Even little Gio compares highly:

Both players have played at four clubs, so let's use MATHEMATIC RIGOUR to calculate the average crowd these two pulled (by using the admittedly unrock-solid capacities: you could argue I'm being biased towards JD by assuming Bournemouth and Pompey sold out regularly!).

GdS=47k
JD=25.75k

This results in GdS=1.82JD That's nearly twice as good!

So, I think this clears up any misunderstanding, any loose conjecture and all the attendant name-calling and accusations of ignorance.

Please bear in mind, this isn't just some ill-thought out crusade based on little more than my own petty prejudices; if you don't like the FACKS staring you in your bloodshot eye, don't blame me, BLAME SCIENCE. BLAME DEFOE. Just don't blame me, OK???

[steelktm]

so how does that compare when Defoe scored more goals than Crouch last season?. . . ewww wait i promised i would not slag Crouch tonight so i'll repost tomorrow if i see this thread.

[USpur]

All makes sense to me. Thanks for showing your work.

[Heroes]

Yeah, I'm with USpur - I understood all that and THFCire would turn that into a dissertation ha ha ha

[thfcire]

Yeah, I'm with USpur - I understood all that and THFCire would turn that into a dissertation ha ha ha

nah mate i only ever get a starter and main course {hee heee}

[edmonds44]

OMFG... Why can't we just support ALL of our players? so what if on paper he's not as good as anyone else?

I do believe that 'Arry is the manager (and a bloody good one at that) so I trust him in when he plays Defoe over Keane Pav Crouch or GDS...

He puts of a Spurs shirt week in week out and tries his best for our club and what does he get in return... a shite load of haters...

I'm not even going to go into detail about how much time that took you for some pointless facts

[Rev John Ripsher]

"""So, I think this clears up any misunderstanding, any loose conjecture and all the attendant name-calling and accusations of ignorance.

Please bear in mind, this isn't just some ill-thought out crusade based on little more than my own petty prejudices; if you don't like the FACKS staring you in your bloodshot eye, don't blame me, BLAME SCIENCE. BLAME DEFOE. Just don't blame me, OK???[/QUOTE]"""""

__________________________________________________ ___________



I think that this well thought out pile of crap , masquerading as FACTS would have served all of us much better if you had used players from Spurs versus players from Arsenil ? Instead of having yet another snide dig at your own family .

[P UNIT 1980]

Loooooooool edmunds I believe this to ba a piss take of the highest caliber!!!

Funny as a mofo.

[ToDareIsToDo]

........ You have to worry about the mental capacity of anyone who doesn't realise that there is some serious pulling of legs going on here ......

[edmonds44]

well sorry if it is? but come one thats gone into a serious amount of detail for a joke?

I mean if that was said in a pub i would have got bored and walked off...

[orlandospursfan]

Let's ask maths.

Four scored today proving, using SCIENCE FACKED, that Crouch is three times better than JD.

PC=3JD

Now, it's also a SCIENCE FACKED that Pav is basically Crouch only shorter by a ratio of 1.07 and equal in every single other way (Pav's capacity to f**k the English language is offset by Pete's capacity to f**k Algerian prostitutes).

So PC=1.07RP

Therefore, Pav is 2.8 times the player Jermain is.

To continue:

Pav has scored 15 in 35 appearances for his international team, while Robbie Keane has 43 from 100, leaving both on a gpg ratio of 0.43!

This means that, shockingly, even RK=2.8JD

But wait! There's more troubling news for you sick, deluded, possibly closet racist JD fans...

Even little Gio compares highly:

Both players have played at four clubs, so let's use MATHEMATIC RIGOUR to calculate the average crowd these two pulled (by using the admittedly unrock-solid capacities: you could argue I'm being biased towards JD by assuming Bournemouth and Pompey sold out regularly!).

GdS=47k
JD=25.75k

This results in GdS=1.82JD That's nearly twice as good!

So, I think this clears up any misunderstanding, any loose conjecture and all the attendant name-calling and accusations of ignorance.

Please bear in mind, this isn't just some ill-thought out crusade based on little more than my own petty prejudices; if you don't like the FACKS staring you in your bloodshot eye, don't blame me, BLAME SCIENCE. BLAME DEFOE. Just don't blame me, OK???

Clever........


2rub7eoeem.jpg

[rudi]

Edit: never mind, life's too short.

[rudi]

well sorry if it is? but come one thats gone into a serious amount of detail for a joke?

Bloody hell man, the detail is the point, it's a series of unconnected actual facts used to make a spurious assertion. And the time it took? Well I type with more than one finger so, y'know, I probably typed it faster than you read it out loud.

I mean if that was said in a pub i would have got bored and walked off...

Probably for the best; it appear to sail over your head anyway, wasting your time and mine...

[BrumSpur]

Rudi, you're wasted here!

[rudi]

Rudi, you're wasted here!

I'm wasted most places. I certainly was when I posted this thread...